15 Lies Women Need To Telling Themselves

If you find yourself in here, just say ouch and do better. We are so critical of ourselves. You don’t realize how amazing you truly are. I hope that after reading this you’ll stop telling those lies. Here are 15 lies women need to STOP telling themselves. 

Photo by Paul Bonafide Eferianor on Pexels.com
  1. Not seeing a dramatic difference right away means that you failed. You did not fail. The small victories will accumulate to create big ones. Vanessa Santos
  2. I need to lose weight to be happy. Many times the number on the scale is not the real issue. The REAL issue is that women feel like they are never truly good enough. They feel like if they lose weight, they will be happier, they will have more friends, they will feel more fulfilled in their jobs, they will find a loving partner, or their partner will love them more. In reality, women need to love themselves FIRST for any of that to transpire, and it has nothing to do with their weight. Azizi Marshall, Founder & CEO, Center for Creative Arts Therapy & Artful Wellness Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and Board Certified Trainer in Drama Therapy 
  3.      I have to work in a job I hate: You don’t have to be stuck in a miserable job. If you’re not happy and stimulated with your work or if you feel unappreciated or frustrated, start making a plan. If you feel you need a change, you may be able to move to a different position or department within your company, or you may want to look for a new job entirely. If you stay at your present job, ask for raises and promotions, if you feel that you’ve earned them. Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., (aka “Dr. Romance”) psychotherapist and author of  The 10 Smartest Decisions a Woman Can Make Before 40 https://amzn.to/2Hz7mYf
  4. With it being a new year, women should stop telling themselves they are bad parents. As a parent myself, we often suffer from these thoughts when we are unable to provide extra toys, fun, and more to our children. However, just spending time with our children riding bikes, playing a game and more is FREE. Spending time is something they will remember because a material object will lose its hype within a month or so. Ashley Havecker Blogger at The Irish Twins Momma
  5. Women need to stop censoring themselves so much at work. Too often, women feel the need to stay quiet and not overstep bounds, which can get in the way of creativity and innovation. Whether it’s embracing your femininity, stepping into authority, or questioning peers, challenge the idea that you’re being ‘too much” or ‘too loud’” Isabel Strobing, Community Manager at Mainvest www.mainvest.com
  6. I think a big one is that they don’t have enough time when in reality it is much easier to take care of yourself than it is to be busy. Take 10 minutes in the morning to read your goals and do a single set of five pushups, five squats, and five situps. In five minutes of time investment, you could put yourself on a path to a healthier lifestyle. Geoffrey Lions, https://selfcareauthority.com
  7. Acne before my period is normal, I just have to accept and live with it. Wrong. Acne before your period or acne which flares just before your period is not normal and you do not have to accept and live with it. If you’re stuck in a constant treating healing cycle in sync with your period it’s a sure sign you have underlying hormonal imbalances that are not being addressed. The delicate balance of not just estrogen, testosterone, and progesterone but also insulin and cortisol hormones are at play here. Acne breakouts are a signal your health and well-being needs attention. Cheryl Woodman MChem Scientist, skin health expert, award-winning skincare formulator honestyforyourskin.co.uk | @honestyforskin
  8. I’ll be happy once I ….Our happiness should never be tied to a resolution/goal because this will keep us from achieving the transformation we want. Being happy is a daily practice. When we choose to be happy, this gives us the motivation to move forward taking the steps required to achieve the goal/transformation we seek. Ro Sanchez, and I’m a certified Master Sexpert who owns a sex-self-care wellness brand for womxn, She.Slips.
  9. I know my partner loves me even if they don’t treat me well. When people show you who they are you should believe them. If your partner doesn’t show you the love and respect you need, it is time to seek counseling or move on. Life is too short to allow yourself to wallow in a negative relationship. It will infiltrate your self-esteem and every other aspect of your life. Linda Mueller Life Coach & Founder of The Expat Partner Coach LLC
  10. All men are liars, cheats, and players! If that’s been your experience, you’ve been hanging with the wrong men. It’s that simple. We attract into our lives what we believe we deserve. Do some inner work before dating any new partners. Rosalind Sedacca, CLCDating In Mid-Life Mentor & Coach
  11. “I need to have perfect skin to be beautiful”. Perfect skin doesn’t exist and the notion that women need to look a certain way is outdated. Olamide Olowe Company: Topicals Co-founder & CEO
  12. “Women’s sex lives are over once they hit menopause.”The reality: The discomfort of many of the physical changes in the run-up to menopause (which can include sore breasts, sleeplessness, flooding periods, and mental changes such as increased anxiety) may put sex down the priority list for a while. But post-menopause, as hormonal changes level out, sexual desire and satisfaction can skyrocket – whether a woman chooses to take hormone replacement therapy or not. With reproduction off the table, the act of sex becomes entirely one of pleasure and many women feel liberated at this time. Ruth Ramsay, Erotic Empowerment Coach, UK – http://www.ruthramsay.com 
  13. Your body is ruined by having children No! Many husbands are more attracted to their wives when they become mothers, they consider it very sexy and nurturing. Elisabeth Goldberg, LMFT Relationship Therapist
  14.  “I’m not worthy”. As a confidence and mindset coach, I see this over and over again. In this patriarchal society, women have been conditioned to believe that we aren’t thin enough, smart enough, good enough, pretty enough; and it’s bull. We are uniquely equipped to live the lives of our dreams – and we are exactly on time for them. All women are worthy of the life they desire. Lauren Kester
  15. That you must choose one set path or passion. You are on this earth for a purpose. But that purpose doesn’t always have to be channeled into one specific avenue. There is so much well-meaning content out there that says you have to pick and stay in your lane, that you have to narrow your focus, and that you have to walk one path because if you are constantly distracted by everything else, you’ll never truly succeed. That’s not true. Although this has taken me years to discover, being a multi-passionate person is a blessing and a gift. If you identify with that label, own it with pride. Pursue those passions – and pursue them simultaneously if it feels right. Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to do, be, or follow a one set path. Marisa Donnelly Writer, Poet, Essayist & Editor

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